SNL- Hamm & Bublé

When I think back to last season's episode with Jon Hamm all I can remember from it is Jon Hamm's John Ham. A year from now I'm pretty sure the only thing I'll remember from this week's episode is Hamm & Bublé. While last year's clever sketch on Hamm's name was just that, clever, this season's variety took things to the next level. It wasn't only a great idea, it also had substance to it and was performed extremely well.

Hamm does dominating yet gracious extremely well and it seems to me that Michael Bublé does everything well. Besides being able to sing with the best of them, Bublé showed once again that he's got the acting chops to go toe to toe with the best. When I say once again I am of course referring to his one episode guest stint on Las Vegas back in 2004 where he played himself.

Back in that episode of my favorite Josh Duhamel tv show, Bublé played himself as a confused performer. He didn't want to sing at the wonderful Montecito Resort & Casino, but rather do stand up comedy, spin plates on top of sticks and of course mime his infamous Bublé in a Bubble. Of course all of these silly ideas were just his way of pranking the terrible Mary Connell who deserved every bit of it.

I found it fitting that at Hamm & Bublé he would also not be doing his normal singing act, but rather a ventriloquist act followed by a one-man show about William Faulkner. Not only did Bublé play extremely frightened very well in this sketch, but he did it while singing the wrong words to his song "Haven't Met You Yet" with such ease.

The rest of last night's episode was rather dull in my opinion. Sure there were little snippets here and there that gave me a chuckle, not excluding the addition of the Brendan Fraser Special Clap in the Cold Open, but everything was just obvious and not very funny. 1920's Party, New Senator and Court Stenographer were pretty pointless sketches in which they chose to just put Hamm in a familiar situation and failed to find a place for jokes in any of them.

The only other sketch of the night that got me going was Bar. Not for the fact that they brought back the Closet Organizer commercial from earlier in the show, (although I did really like that they did that) but for Will Forte's response to Jon Hamm's statement, "Gin & tonic, hell of a drink."

Friday Night Lights- Injury Limp

Midway through Injury List I started thinking to myself that recently Friday Night Lights just hasn't been that great. Maybe I over-hyped it in my mind, or maybe it has trailed off since the greatness that was the first season, but this year just hasn't been that satisfying.

My initial thought was that the story telling just wasn't anything to write home about, and that the great characters are the main thing holding it together. If you substituted average characters into these plots it would be a sub-par show. The Coach Taylors, Tim Riggins and Matt Saracens of the world may be the reason that nothing that interesting has happened as of late.

Chatting with T-time about this fact, he brought to my attention that the first season might have been that much better because it had such a great story to start with. It was your prototypical sports story, based on the book Friday Night Lights and had plenty to work with. I mean the star quarterback goes down, gets paralyzed, and the team rallies behind the backup QB and wins the Texas State Championship. How are you going to surpass that as a story? Well in my opinion they haven't. What else can you do? Have them lose. Well they did that, now they've run out of sports stories.

Until they get to season four where they have a terrible team and can now use this God awful East Dillon team as a new type of sport story. The winless schmucks that take down the might Dillon Panthers and end their season. The Lions may beat the Panthers at the end of this season, or they may lose, but my major point is that they haven't done a good job at making this story line prominent. Their ability to showcase a great story has been lost. They have come back to a football plot once in a blue moon this season. When they end up beating Dillon at the end of the year, it's not going to feel as satisfying because there hasn't been nearly enough build up.

It seems as though they have been putting much more effort into the side characterization stories. These minor stories of the series have never been fantastic, but the high quality of all of the characters have usually improved them. I've always loved Coach, Riggins, Saracen, Julie, etc. And although I detested many characters over the years (Street, Lyla, Tami) they all have evoked certain emotions, albeit mostly hatred, in order to improve their own plotlines.

Maybe it's that they've run out of good stories, or maybe its that the new characters aren't up to snuff, but recently things haven't had the same feeling. I have definitely grown fond of newcomer Becky Sproles, but I could care less about what is going on in Vince, Luke or Jess's lives at this point. All three come across as dull.

Other Thoughts


-Have they always been terrible at sports related stuff, because this week's aberration was so laughable. Luke limps off of the field after enduring yet another blow to his badly bruised hip. When the coaches take a look at it, they see the ginormous bruise and are outraged. Coach T asks, "What the hell is that?!?" And the assistant coach responds, "It's a hip flexor. He's done. He's out for the season."

First of all, the hip flexors are a group of muscles in the body, not an injury. Sure that's semantics, but if you're not a sports announcer you usually don't say it's "a knee" when someone tears their ACL. Secondly, just from looking at a bruise, this guy knows that Luke has severely strained or torn his hip flexor muscles? I don't think so. I know the show likes to skip past the ins and outs of football as of late, but how bout a little screen time for the kid dealing with this injury instead of saying "hip flexor, out for season."

-I loved Tinker finally getting some nice speaking lines.

-I loved longtime head of Secret Service Aaron Pierce coming back as Landry's dad. I also loved the awkwardness between Jess and Lance's family, especially when the mom asked how she was liking O'Bama as President.

Here's hoping the final two episodes end in a bang.

Poolies Watch- The Kellie Pickler Award

The Kellie Pickler Award is given each year to the best female contestant on a reality competition series. Just like last year, the nominations are looking bleak again in 2010. I can't even field 10 ladies at this point. Last season's champion, Sugar Kiper, is back for Survivor Heroes vs. Villains but I'm not looking for her to repeat. So far the only contestants I have truly enjoyed were Jordan Lloyd on Big Brother for her ridiculous stupidity and Joanna Krupa on The Superstars for her ability to yell and scream at Terrell Owens (and question how he is a professional football player).

Have Performed Well
Jordan Lloyd- Big Brother
Joanna Krupa- The Superstars
Kristi Leskinen- The Superstars
Monica Padilla- Survivor Samoa

I hope none of these jokes earn a spot on the ballot. Laura Crosby was a decent enough girl, but didn't make it longer than one or two weeks on Big Bro. Meghan from Amazing Race was actually annoying at times, but okay at others. I didn't like Laura Morett at all on Survivor Samoa, but could see others maybe enjoying her style. And all the Fab Five did on Talent was tap dance, but it was pretty sweet.

Didn't Do Much
Fab Five- AGT
Laura Crosby- Big Brother
Laura Morett- Survivor Samoa
Meghan- Amazing Race

Hopefully some talent will come out of Idol and the second editions of Survivor and Amazing Race, but things are looking bleak. The Poolies Committee might have to get rid of the Kellie Pickler Award and make the Terry Fator Award co-ed because these females just aren't cutting it lately.

If there is anyone out there from other shows (Top Chef, So You Think, Apprentice, etc.) let me know.

Peyton Manning the Card Player

It takes a pretty momentous occasion to get me to blog about a sporting event these days. Sure when my favorite athlete on my favorite team wins his fourth NFL MVP award, I'll write something up to proclaim my love for him. When that same team wins the AFC Championship and is on their way to their second Super Bowl in four years I'm not that inclined to post. But, when said favorite athlete dissects the (stat-based) best defense in the league in a fashion that seems eerily familiar, The Kid gets inspired.

I am not alluding to Joe Montana, Johnny Unitas or any other great quarterback of years past. Peyton Manning's stunning performance from yesterday's championship game was oh so similar to the day Brett Maverick had when he sat down to play poker with Annabelle Bransford, Angel The Spaniard and the rest of the card players in Crystal River.

Just as Rex Ryan and the rest of the J-E-T-S were running their mouths the week up to Sunday's game, Annabelle seemed to never shut up, while Angel and the young gunfighter seemed to think they easily had what it took to take out Maverick in this game of cards. In order to be allowed into the game of five card draw, Brett had to promise to lose for at least an hour. While watching the game yesterday it seemed as though Peyton and head coach Jim Caldwell made a similar promise to the New Yorkers. We promise that we will lose, for at least an hour. And they did, 17-6.

Just as Maverick explains (after taking pot after pot from the fools) he was simply learning their tells while losing. As Angel, Annabelle and the gang stole pots from Brett, he simply smiled and waited until he had enough information to take them all for all that they were worth. This is exactly what Peyton did to the Jets. As he was rushed and blitzed from all angles, he never panicked. He merely took the sack when he needed to, stayed patient, and figured out exactly how the Jet defense was playing him.


After falling to the ground on his own a few times, instead of fumbling or throwing picks like the quarterbacks before him did against the Jets, Peyton turned things around as he ended the first half with a 58 second drive that brought the Colts within four points, at 17-14. While Maverick figured out that Annabelle twirled her hair when she was bluffing, Peyton similarly figured out exactly how to slice through the vaunted Jets D by getting the ball in perfect position for Austin Collie to make three easy catches on his way to the endzone.

Angel continued to shuffle his front cards to the back and his back cards to the front and Maverick kept on getting richer. Come the second half, Peyton took advantage of the corner backs that couldn't cover, lighting up the defense by connecting with Pierre Garçon on a total of 11 catches for 151 yards and a touchdown. All in all Peyton took over the game and routed the Jets, 30-17, finishing with 377 yards, three tds and no picks.

Now don't get me wrong, the parallels aren't all there. No one came in during the middle of the game and threatened to kill Peyton if he didn't throw some interceptions, which then led to a huge fight in the parking lot where Peyton beat up seven dudes with weapons. But hey they can't all be winners kids.

Catching Up- Breaking Bad

So here's the thing. A couple years ago when everyone was talking about the two new AMC shows that were fantastic, I tossed the comments aside because the shows were on AMC. As the past couple years have gone by, not only have I become a big fan of both Mad Men and now Breaking Bad, but it seems that a lot of the great tv is coming from cable networks. Not just pay cable, but also basic cable like AMC and FX. Although I have enjoyed Mad Men, obviously not as much as the rabid Sterling Cooper fans out there, it is not anywhere near as good as its AMC counterpart. The first two seasons of Breaking Bad were fantastic and I'm looking forward to the third installment beginning in March.

The first question I had to ask is why Bryan Cranston? Since I never watched Malcolm in the Middle, I knew Cranston as the two Tims. Dr. Tim Whatley from Seinfeld and Doug Heffernan's neighbor Tim in King of Queens. Don't get me wrong, I though he was hilarious as both characters, but what was on his imdb resume that made him the choice for the character of Walter White? This character that begins the series as an soft spoken, awkward high school teacher with no charisma and turns into a hard as they come, big time drug dealer with a temper that could hurt people. Wherever they found this in him, I'm glad they did, because he has been the perfect man for the job thus far.

The maturation of Walt throughout the first 20 episodes is the most interesting aspect of the series. As he starts out with his goofy haircut, glasses and silly looking mustache, I thought to myself (as do the rest of the characters on the show) that there is no way this guy can become a drug dealer. I mean look at those sweaters he wears! But sure enough, the dude gets cancer, shaves his head and evolves into one of the toughest dudes I've seen on television.

There is one moment when this stands out to me the most. It came in the penultimate episode of season one. After Walt's partner Jesse (who I really love as a character) gets beat the snot out of by drug lord Tuco, Walt decides he is going to go make a visit to this Tuco and get done the drug deal that Jesse couldn't finish. Jesse, myself, and I assume the rest of the audience are thinking to themselves 'what the h-e-double hockey sticks is this guy thinking? How is he going to pull something like this off?

Walt had changed. As he walked into Tuco's drug layer he had the look in his eye. He was getting this done. I still had no idea how he was going to do it, but he was going to do it. While it looked like more meth for Tuco, Walt had concocted a type of explosive that could theoretically destroy the entire building. With a quick toss of a piece of it at a window, Walt blew out every single window in the room. As he stood with more of this concoction in his hand, he demanded from the drug king pin all of the money that he deserved and from then on everyone in the drug game in the ABQ respected the one they call Heisenberg.

Although most of this review is going to be about Walter, because he is the most interesting character, that is not to say that he is my favorite. Jesse Pinkman is easily my favorite character on the show. Unlike Walt, he never has moments where I want to slap him for being lame. Jesse is an idiot at times, a complete addict at other times, but he's always sweet and is completely lovable. And for that reason, Walt stays with him time and time again. Gus, the owner of Pollos Hermanos and a big time dealer that buys from Walt, asks Heisenberg why on Earth would he work with a screw up like Jesse. And although it's not the answer that Walt gave, the reason is because he loves this kid. He treats him like the son he wished he had. I'm not saying Walt has something against his own kid, but for some reason he hasn't been able to give Walt Jr. the fatherly love he deserves. Through thick and thin, Walt Sr. has been there for Jesse and watching them grow on each other throughout the first two seasons has been nothing less than magic.

The writing/directing technique that I love most about Breaking Bad is the way they use the cold open on many occasions. I know there is a word for it, but I can't remember what it is, when you start the episode with something that will happen at the end and then skip back in time. It's done on tv and movies all the time, but I can't remember the specific word for it. Unlike the one episode of Flash Forward this technique was used, Breaking Bad (like Not Our First Rodéo) uses it perfectly. Flash's opening sequence was a gun shot that was heading for a main character's head. It was way too obvious that that character was going to die, so why even use that? What Breaking tends to do every time they use this technique is show you an event that is so ambiguous that you are left wondering what the heck the scene is and how in the world are they going to get there.

Going back to the aforementioned season one ep, they started out the episode with Walt walking away from a building in the ghetto with sirens on in the background. Now that wasn't very climactic at all, but it got me wondering how was he going to get himself into that situation. As he got closer to going to Tuco's place it made more and more sense. After he blows up the building and leaves with all his money, walking away from the building in the ghetto, it's that much more satisfying.

The only disappointment I had with the strategy is that they used it for the entire season two, and the pay off wasn't very good. They started the first episode of the second season with the cold open of Walt's pool with a burnt pink stuffed bear and sirens in the background. When nothing happened with that story line in the entirety of the first ep, I realized they were foreshadowing the end of the season. They used that cold open again in ep 4, ep 10 and the season two finale. In the end it was Jane's dad being bad at his job and making two planes collide. A pink stuffed bear was obviously on one of the planes and fell from the sky and landed in Walt's pool. Yeah sure a plane crash is a big deal, but not in how it relates to the main characters of our show. Kind of a let down.

With Skyler kicking Walt out of the house, Hank getting back on the hunt for Heisenberg, and Gus finding out Walt's brother-in-law is in the DEA, and Jesse in rehab, there should be many complications for Walter H. White come season three.

Favorite Characters

1. Jesse Pinkman
2. Hank Schrader
3. Walter White, Sr.
.
.
.
98. Walter White, Jr.
99. Marie Schrader
100. Skyler White

Comedy Night Done (Almost) Right

You have not had one of your best seasons to date, you leave off the fall slate of episodes with a sub-par Christmas ep, you come back from a one month, 11 day layoff and you throw up over all your viewers show a clips episode? What is wrong with the people at The Office? Last night's two hours of comedy on NBC was great in my opinion except for the glaring whole from 9:00-9:30 when they decided to show mediocre what they thought were some great clips of Office past. What it did was simply get me angry at them and have a worse impression of how this season has gone so far. Is it now an inaccurate view of the sixth season? Maybe, but that's not gonna stop me from taking it out on the Scranton people come Poolies season.

Elsewhere on what is supposed to be Comedy Night Done Right, we had great showings from all three (a bit of a first). Between Pierce's fantastically timed gay jokes at Troy's dancing on Community, Andy Dwyer single-handedly making Parks and Rec a must-watch, and 30 Rock borrowing the fictitious curse word, "vondruke" from an old Will Ferrell SNL sketch it could have been a comedic night for the ages. But no. The people at The Office had to ruin it with the most fillerific of episodes I have seen in a good while.

As I re-watched Community trying to remember all of Pierce's fantastic quotes, I realized that this episode may have been Chevy Chase's best performance since Vegas Vacation. Truly fantastic. Did he say anything last night that wasn't hilarious? I don't think so.

Pierce Quotes

• "You know when I was 30 people used to wish that I was dead to my face! That's called respect."
• "That's ridiculous. Obviously it's a guy."
• "Jerry Rice?? Ahh, I liked him."
• "Tea for two? There are five people."
• "Ohhh, plot twist."
• "Culturally, it's unacceptable, but it's theatrical dynamite!"
• "And such a creative way to tell the world you're gay."

Fantasy Survivor- Heroes vs. Villains

With the new season of Survivor set to premier on February 11 it is time to draft. It will be the third All-Stars season of the series, this time labeled Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains. Although it seems that their idea of a villain is not the same as mine, I'll take it anyway. Neither Russell Hantz, who manipulated his opponents in order to please the audience, nor Coach Wade, who made up ridiculous lies to inadvertently please the audience, are villains in my book. Never-the-less they are both back for this All-Star edition of Survivor. Shot in Samoa, the same spot as last season, and right after the last season finished, it should be interesting. None of the contestants will have any idea what Russell H is about, but seeing how sad he was when he lost season 20, it doesn't seem like he made it far enough to win H vs. V.

Rules

Old things
Points for Advancing: 1, 2, 4, 7, 11, etc.
Reward: Group: 4, Individual: 10
Immunity: Group 8, Individual: 20
Labeled Leader: 10
Make to Merge: 8
Votes against you: -4

New things
If you get chosen to sit out you get none of those challenge points.
Find Hidden Idol: 10
Successfully Use Idol at Council: 20
Unneeded Use of Idol at Council: -10
Cause Jeff to Stop Challenge: -10
Exit Due to Health: -20

Lost things
Man sh*t
Back stab
--in both cases the line is too blurry to decide when one of them actually occurs.

Draft

Two separate drafts. One for Heroes. One for Villains.
I picked the names out of a hat and it came out: Jaydon, Mags, Lar, me.
Therefore Jay will get to choose whether he wants first pick of the Heroes draft and last pick in the villains or vice versa. I will get first in the one he doesn't choose and Lar and Mags will be in the middle for both.

My team name this season will be Redwood Original after my favorite biker gang.

Follow draft picks at @quietpool, @jaydonthedon, @1mags, and @larrington_bevy

Poolies Watch- Terry Fator Award

The Terry Fator Award is given each year to the best male contestant in a reality competition series, as honored by the Poolie Voters. With a second season of Survivor chock full of all-stars and American Idol finals still on the horizon, I don't see more than five of these current nominees staying put. Of the top five that I like to stick around, Jeff and the Russell's should be confident in their performances. Each demonstrated both the ability to play their respective game and the ability to entertain me in the process. With Russell Hantz coming back for Heroes vs. Villain and Jeff rumored to be on this spring's Amazing Race, they both have chances to win this thing.

Those With a Chance
Jeff Schroeder- Big Brother
Nota- The Sing Off
Russell Hantz- Survivor Samoa
Russell Kairouz- Big Brother
Terrell Owens- The Superstars

The rest of these guys are highly unlikely to make the final cut, but it's nice for them to get noticed among those that performed well this summer/fall. Flight Time has the best chance to sneak in if no one from the spring version of The Amazing Race does anything well.

Not Likely
Beelzebubs- The Sing Off
Bode Miller- The Superstars
Brian- The Amazing Race
Casey Turner- Big Brother
Flight Time- The Amazing Race
John Fincher- Survivor Samoa
Zev and Justin- The Amazing Race

Anybody else deserve a look? Any good cooks out there from Top Chef?