Fantasy Idol Results- A Save and a Slap

During my vacation I don't feel like complaining about how much I hate Kara DioGuardi or the fact that she was all excited/shocked when Michael Lynche was saved. Kara, you realize it was your decision as the judges to save him so wipe that smug surprised smile off of your face before I do it for you.

Fantasy Scores

The Rock Bodega
Casey James- Safe (22)= 22
Janell Wheeler
Tim Urban- Safe (22)= 22
Lee DeWyze- Safe (22)= 22
Week 7= 66 Total= 172

You're Coming With Me Leather
Andrew Garcia- Bottom 3 (-7), Safe (22)= 15
Paige Miles
Aaron Kelly- Bottom 3 (-7), Safe (22)= 15
John Park
Week 7= 30 Total= 104

The Curlgar
Ashley Rodriguez
Joe Muñoz
Haley Vaughn
Siobhan Magnus- Safe (22)= 22
Week 7= 22 Total= 56

Splash Downs All Around
Todrick Hall
Crystal Bowersox- Safe (22)= 22
Tyler Grady
Michelle Delamor
Week 7= 22 Total= 55

Diabolical Haters
Didi Benami
Lilly Scott
Lacey Brown
Michael Lynch- Bottom 3 (-7), Safe (22)= 15
Week 7= 15 Total= 55

HashTag Katie Stevens Is Only 16
Katie Stevens- Safe (22)= 22
Jermaine Sellers
Katelyn Epperly
Alex Lambert
Week 7= 22 Total= 43

American Idol- Judging the Judges

Now that the terribleness that was this year's American Idol auditions are over, we can get down to brass tacks* here and talk about what has gone down so far. To be fair, I don't really pay that much attention during these eps, but it seems as though the quality is way down this season. No one has stood out at all so far. Having said that, last year's winner was never shown in the audition episodes, so they have that going for them. Other than the Pants on the Ground guy, I'm not gonna remember a single audition from this season. Speaking of the latest Idol craze, Jimmy Fallon's version he did on his show was just fantastic.

*I recently heard this phrase for the first time in a while and realized it is fantastic, but I had no idea where it came from. After doing a bit of research on wiki, it seems nobody really knows.

The only part of the auditions that is really worth talking about is obviously the judges. Sadly Paula is gone and while the producers took their time finding her replacement, we got guest judges for each of these audition sites.

• Victoria Beckham- blah
• Mary J. Blige- blah
• Shania Twain- annoying
• Kristin Chenowith- insightful
• Avril Lavigne- cute
• Katy Perry- FANTASTIC
• Neil Patrick Harris- annoying
• Joe Jonas- blah

Going into this season of American Idol, there was only one out of the eight guest judges that I had any pre-conceived opinion on, Joe Jonas. He's fantastic on JONAS and in Camp Rock, but here he was either to scared to say anything or the producers just cut everything but "yea" out of the episodes.

Posh, Mary J., Avril and Joey didn't bring anything to the table as judges. Kristin Chenowith seemed to know what she was talking about and made an effort to give some pointers, but was still boring in her approach. Then we get to my two least favorites of the guest judging era. Shania Twain and Neil Patrick Harris, although most people loved them, were incredibly annoying. Neil was just trying to take over the whole panel and it just didn't work for me. Shania, meanwhile, seemed to almost be a reincarnation of Mary Murphy from So You Think You Can Dance. Off the wall and having no idea what she was talking about. Kinda like Paula on speed, except unlike Ms. Abdul, the things she said weren't ridiculous enough to be funny.

And then we have the one guest judge who could and should take a permanent seat behind the table. She was funny, she was honest, she was mean when she needed to be, and by golly she got into plenty of fights with the devil they call Kara DioGuardi. Whether it was Katy explaining to Kara that you shouldn't let a contestant through just because you feel bad for them, or Mr. Russell Brand threatening to throw her coke in Kara's face if she continued to sing "I kissed a girl", she was incredible throughout the episode.

She continued to shine, while Kara continued to fall deeper and deeper into her place as one of the worst people on television. After one person auditioned for the judges Kara noted that this guy had just enough 'talent' and just enough of a 'story' to go far in this thing. Katy responded with "This is a Lifetime movie." Although the producers and many of the fans seem to think that the people that go far in this thing should be those that come far hardships and have fantastic stories, Katy, Simon and I know that people should do well because they are good singers and they have the personality to connect with America. That is it. The more Kara tries to come up with new things to say this season, the more she is going be unbearable. I didn't think she could get any worse than what she did to our television screens last year, but it seems she might be up to the task.

With the Hollywood round starting on February 9th, we welcome Ellen DeGeneres as the new full-time judge, as she sits in Paula's vacant seat next to Simon. I have both high hopes and high expectations for Ellen going into the ninth season of Idol. She is nothing like Paula, so I think she will bring a bit of new life to the show. Unlike the other three judges sitting behind the table, Ellen has the ability to come up with interesting and new things to say all the time. She does it all the time, for a living. Yeah I know Simon is usually awesome and says really mean things to the contestants, but sometimes the things he says get repetitive. His repetition will always be miles better than the garbage that flows out of the mouths of Kara and Randy, but it can still sometimes become boring. I feel Ellen has the chance to be insightful and creative up there. Let's just hope she knows anything about music.

Judging Idol

Thoughts

Before I get to all of my complaining about this show, let me preface it with the fact that I enjoy shows that I get angry with. A prime example was how much I hated Mary from Las Vegas. Vegas was definitely one of my favorite character driven shows and hating everything that Mary did made it fun to scream and yell when she did something else that I couldn't stand. That's the way I've been feeling yet again with Idol this season.

Kara DioGuardi is one of the worst additions to a television program in history. I never thought that I wouldn't be able to stand someone more than Paula, but Kara makes Paula refreshing. Kara is the absolute WORST. She blabs and blabs like she thinks she knows what she's talking about. At least Paula knows she's an idiot. Kara is kind of closer to Randy in that sense, she takes the worst parts of Randy and Paula and has created one uber-terrible judge.

I definitely enjoyed the less airtime for auditions this year. I am not one of those people that enjoy watching millions of terrible auditions. It gets old real fast. I feel the change in format for the semi-finals is a good change of pace, it kind of dragged the past couple of years. As a bonus we don't end up with an equal number of guys and girls. Because if you know anything about me, you know that I think guys are better at most things, including Idol.

Quick Summaries

Group 1: Alexis Grace, Danny Gokey (right) and Michael Sarver made it through. Wow early terribleness from America. Sarver, really? Gokey was the best in the group but I agreed with Simon that it was nothing special. Alexis was barely the best girl, none of them were very good in this group.

Group 2: Adam Lambert, Kris Allen and Allison Iraheta got through from this group. I enjoyed all three of these. Lambert showed a lot of talent in his first performance, but was kinda of crazy at times.

Group 3: Lil Rounds, Scott MacIntyre and Jorge Nunez won this round. Very good group in which I disagreed wholeheartedly with the choices by America. God did the judges praise Lil Rounds (being in the last spot, the producers obviously want her to win). I wasn't impressed. She showed talent but there was nothing special. Blind Scott was not good and Jorge was good but uncomfortable to watch afterward with all his Spanish thinking. I guess in the end I would've gone with Rounds, Ju'not Joyner and Von Smith (but Von greatly disappointed in the wild-card so good job America).

Wildcard Round

Jessica Langseth: wow was this performance bad.

Megan Joy Corkrey (right): also bad but not quite on Jessica's level. Talked through the entire song. Obviously the judges praised her because they need to increase their number of females in the finals.

Matt Giraud: I liked this performance of Who's Loving You. The judges have said it a million times but this was a much better song choice for him and he definitely did enough to make the finals.

Von Smith: Like I said before, he blew it. On Tuesday he was great, switching back and forth from his falsetto do his normal voice but tonight he almost tried to do the whole thing in a high pitch and it didn't work for me or anyone.

Jasmine Murray: She comes out with a powerful Christina Agulaira song and did very well. Randy and Kara are completely idiotic again. Randy says song was too big for her. No, her thing is big songs, she has a big voice just not great control. That's why the Sara Bareilles song last time didn't work. Kara goes "I didn't know you had this big voice." How dumb are you Kara? You all criticized her in week 1 for picking a song that didn't show off her big voice. That's all you knew about her. Wow.

Ricky Braddy: A decent job, but he's just too forgettable.

Tatiana Del Toro: She sings the exact same song she did in group 1. Are you joking? Repeating songs is one thing but in back to back weeks during your first two times in front of America? Soo dumb and the judges criticized her for it. It was a decent performance though.

Anoop Desai: This guy is just being so dumb. He has a big fan base, a big voice and a big personality and he is killing himself with these song choices. He has done two songs in the first two performances that feature a chorus sung completely by backup singers. He adlibs throughout the performance and doesn't get a chance to actually sing. It kills me because he could be real good, I feel.

So they end up taking four from the wildcard instead of three. Matt Giraud, Jasmine Murray, Megan Joy Corkrey and Anoop Desai. I agree with everything except there was no need for Corkrey.

Finals predictions

13. Michael Sarver
12. Megan Joy Corkrey
11. Kris Allen
10. Jasmine Murray
9. Matt Giraud
8. Jorge Nunez
7. Alexis Grace
6. Anooop Desai
5. Scott MacIntyre
4. Allison Iraheta
3. Lil Rounds
2. Danny Gokey
1. Adam Lambert (right)